Strange search-engine queries (521)

The West Coast is being spattered by liquid; the East Coast is covered by what used to be liquid before it froze. Here in the middle, we’re seeing a big yellow ball in the sky that hadn’t previously been detected for about a week. But while everyone’s routines are disrupted, some things go on, and one of them is this “Let’s see all the search strings!” bit.

todd rundgren misprint something anything:  Hello, it’s me, you’ve thought about this for how long?

sarah palin squirmish:  Perhaps she was uncomfortable.

people who hate reality shows are really just old, humorless sourpusses. what propaganda technique does the writer employ in this statement?  See section 6.2 of the National Association for a Kardashian-Free Society bylaws.

palestinians cheering 9/11:  Well, they’re just old, humorless sourpusses.

“ways to” “persuasively” towel:  The trick is to get her dry at the exact moment you get her wet.

“membership to this website is public” wall mount gun rack:  And the public never, ever acts up. Wonder why?

we’ve found that lots of messages from are spam:  These days, it doesn’t matter whom they’re from.

shoe retry timeout exceeded:  Geez, how long does it take to put on a pair of shoes?

maybe he’ll know cyndi lauper:  She will be waiting, time after time.

refrigerator not cold:  Did you check to see if it was running?

something different with steak:  A small lump of feldspar.

intj stare:  We do not stare. We brood.

buy-o-mart sells magazines at a 10% discount. what amount will you pay the cashier for a magazine that costs $5.99 and has a sales tax of 4%?  If I tell you, you’re going to be so screwed when the teacher tells you to show your work.

Also, there were several dozen instances of “received the verification code, you will be able to choose a new password for your account” followed by a single random word. This is the level of hacking engaged in by the sort of people who can’t figure out the price of a magazine with a discount and a sales tax.



  1. McGehee »

    25 January 2016 · 8:57 am

    What price would I pay for a magazine that costs $5.99? What’s its octane rating?

    Since both gas and magazines have risen so much in price since I was 16, I had to give up one.

  2. miniapplejack »

    25 January 2016 · 9:51 am

    National Association for a Kardashian-Free Society – Sign me up!

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