So this happened in Grand Rapids:
A former Grant High School science teacher has pleaded guilty to having inappropriate sexual contact with a female student with whom she exchanged about 14,000 text messages during a four-week period last fall.
Robert Stacy McCain, on that awfully large-sounding number:
Let’s see: 14,000 messages in 28 days? That’s 500 messages a day or — subtracting 8 hours a night for sleep, leaving 16 hours for daily texting — about 31 messages per hour. One wonders how either of them ever found time to do anything else except, you know, the “anything else” called criminal sexual misconduct.
Perhaps they weren’t getting much sleep.
Then there’s this old routine. Two women at tea. Says one: “Last night with him, wonderful! I came four times.”
Replies the other: “You weren’t screwing, honey. You were counting.”