There’s lots of stuff at Interested-Participant, but arguably the label most often used at that blog is “Women With Troubles,” and a rather large number of the women in question have been caught with some underaged kid, though usually not in mid-diddle. In one recent incident, a 31-year-old ex-band teacher, following an anonymous tip, was busted for a 2012 tryst with a 14-year-old of apparently indeterminate gender; there is no shortage of other examples.
Robert Stacy McCain, who has been covering this phenomenon for many months, explains how this sort of thing can happen:
If we set aside all moral, legal, social and ethical objections to such behavior, must we pretend that we are unable to explain why a woman would be interested in a 15-year-old boy? Oh, hell, no.
Having once been a teenage boy, I know exactly what she enjoys in this activity. If erection equals consent, I was in a condition of permanent consent from the time I was 13 years old. A teenage boy is capable of sexual arousal with the least provocation, or no provocation at all… [E]ven if we ignore whatever aesthetic appeal there might be in the youthful appearance of an adolescent, there are other attributes typical of youth that might lead an adult woman to desire a 15-year-old boy as a sex partner. The teenage boy is more or less a tabula rasa, a lump of unmolded clay, an empty page on which she can inscribe whatever she wishes. Suppose that the teacher, attractive as she may be, is dissatisfied with the quality of her relationships with adult men. There in her classroom is a teenage boy, who is ready, willing and able to attempt any sexual act his teacher may desire him to perform. Not only is the boy’s impetuous eagerness flattering to her ego — adult men are probably less impetuous and more demanding — but as the teenager is less experienced in sexual activity by comparison to her adult male partners, the teen may be more easily tutored to perform sexually in the precise manner that pleases his teacher the most. The boy is more eager to please, more cooperative and less judgmental, and probably far more grateful to have her as a sex partner than any adult male would be.
There’s a lot to be said for “less judgmental.”
This interchange from an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer seems apposite:
Cordelia: So, does looking at guns really make girls wanna have sex? That’s scary.
Xander: Yeah, I guess.
Cordelia: Well, does looking at guns make you wanna have sex?
Xander: I’m seventeen. Looking at linoleum makes me wanna have sex.
Inevitably, there are some incidents where an adult (legally, anyway) woman has chosen a young girl as a partner, which is similarly heinous but is occasionally brushed off, because feminism, or some such excuse.
And there’s this:
We view as creepy the middle-aged executive who divorces his wife and acquires a much younger girlfriend. It’s not just that the 25-year-old female is young enough to be the 50-year-old executive’s daughter (triggering our crypto-Freudian suspicion of symbolically incestuous ideas lurking in the old man’s depraved psyche) but that we assume, without need for any evidence, the young girlfriend is a selfish gold-digger who is cynically trading sex for money and status. Certain other assumptions are involved in the case of an older woman who goes into “cougar” mode, pursuing sex with virile young studs.
One could argue, I suppose, that we don’t have the facts of the matter and therefore should not pass judgment. This works right up until the moment when those facts materialize — but not one second thereafter.