Jenny sets the lineup

How could this possibly go wrong?

It is, of course, right and proper that the Designated Hitter, an abomination unto the Lord, is assigned the number zero.

The Tigers were not amused, however, and blasted Rays pitcher Erik Bedard for six runs on eight hits in two innings, pocketing an 8-1 win at home and dropping Tampa Bay further into the cellar. (Weirdly, the Rays have identical road and home records: they’re 19-25 either way.)

And no, that Squeeze song wouldn’t work: you’d have to send two players into the order twice.



  1. fillyjonk »

    4 July 2014 · 1:43 pm

    They could also call-back to Wilson Pickett, if there’s a 4 somewhere in the list of positions.

  2. Tatyana »

    4 July 2014 · 1:47 pm


  3. CGHill »

    4 July 2014 · 1:53 pm

    Second baseman is 4, so yes. Similarly, the Marvelettes, if you convert “BEechwood 4-5789” to all-digit dialing, though not many catchers, I suspect, bat at the top of the order.

  4. CGHill »

    4 July 2014 · 1:56 pm

    It appears explanations are called for.

    Each position on the field is assigned a number:

    1 — pitcher
    2 — catcher
    3 — first base
    4 — second base
    5 — third base
    6 — shortstop
    7 — right field
    8 — center field
    9 — left field

    As noted, the DH has no assigned number: he’s just the DH.

  5. McGehee »

    4 July 2014 · 5:49 pm

    Where a substitute base runner can be used, Junior’s Used Car Lot would be a simple matter.

  6. Roger Green »

    4 July 2014 · 7:36 pm

    I loved this. But my dad used to take me to minor league games, and I kept score in the book.

  7. Bryan Doe »

    4 July 2014 · 9:24 pm

    LOLing @ (and agreeing with) the DH as “an abomination unto the Lord.” That, and Houston and Milwaukee each continuing in the Wrong League. But that first abomination’s been around forty-plus years, so it’s probably not going anywhere. Then again, those teams had been in their original leagues around forty years before being switched, so Who Knows?

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