To borrow a phrase, I fought the lawn, and the lawn won. It is my policy to have neither the best lawn on the block nor the worst, but I’ve dropped too close for comfort to the low end of the scale, and while the leading (trailing?) contenders have just enough physical proximity to make me look slightly better, I can’t count on this continuing, especially with changes in ownership in the offing.
It was therefore clearly time to call for reinforcements, so I dialed up a vendor, and was presented the next day with an audit of what they’d found.
The lawn was characterized as “fair,” in the sense that you would characterize the Antarctic as “cool.” They consider eleven weed types to be controllable; I had five of them. Of ten potential lawn diseases, three were recognized. On the upside, I had acceptable thatch, and truly, how many of us can say that?
This is, I must point out, not my first choice for a counterattack. There are small creatures in the neighborhood, a legitimate cause for concern, and all else being equal, I’d rather be dealing out mass quantities of something that is less likely to be hazardous to their little systems. But that’s for later, after the Unwanted Botanicals are under control; right now, I need something strong enough to take down low-flying aircraft.
(Oh, and while this should be obvious, it somehow didn’t occur to me: price quotes tend to be based on the dimensions of the areas to be treated — typically, 5000 square feet. This will not work well at Surlywood, where the back yard alone is nearly 6000 square feet. No wonder it takes so long to mow.)