How shellfish of me

Morgan Freeberg extends the classic wrestling-with-a-pig metaphor down the food chain a bit, all the way to mollusks, and this bit of derision is included:

The approval of gastropods like these, is the payoff for gerbil-faced men who pretend to like women who despise them? Membership in their little clique, is the payoff for pretending Queen Latifah is just as sexy as Beyonce?

Maybe it’s just me, but if I were going to come up with a comparison like that, I’d have gone to the trouble of coming up with someone truly hideous, or at least certifiably unattractive, for the role of the Anti-Beyoncé. Queen Latifah, I submit, ain’t it:

Queen Latifah

And you know, it’s never bothered me to find out that someone was a bivalve.

Bonus: The Singer Formerly Known As Dana Owens takes on one of my favorite Sixties tunes.



  1. Lynn »

    18 April 2010 · 8:33 pm

    Being a woman myself, I can’t claim to know which of these ladies is sexier but… okay, what the heck… I’m going to say it even if I don’t know what I’m talking about – Queen Latifah is way sexier than Beyonce.

  2. paulsmos »

    18 April 2010 · 8:51 pm

    take off your adipose laden glasses……

  3. McGehee »

    18 April 2010 · 11:16 pm

    Long before the waist measurement, on the checklist of things that make a woman attractive to me, are Is she interested in me? and Is she nearby?

    If Queen L. and Beyoncé really want to find out which of them I would consider sexier, they’re going to need to come to town and ask me out.

    And then of course they’ll need to survive the Wrath of Wife…

  4. Lisa Paul »

    19 April 2010 · 7:06 pm

    Don’t be dissin’ the Queen. She doesn’t need your approval. But she’ll kick your butt just the same.

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    25 April 2010 · 3:58 pm

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