The Finch Formerly Known As Gold

24 December 2003


Cam Edwards' post about Lenny Bruce receiving a posthumous pardon from New York Governor George Pataki for some reason reminded me of my favorite Bruce story, and how often do I pass up the chance to tell a favorite story?

It was 1963 and Camelot was still in full swing. JFK had stared the Soviets in the eye, and they blinked; Jackie had remade fashion in her own image; a comedian named Vaughn Meader who did a note-perfect Kennedy impression sold zillions of copies of an LP called The First Family and was readying Volume 2; and all, we thought, was right with the world.

Then came November and that terrible day in Dallas and nothing was ever going to be the same. The national funny bone disappeared, with no sign it might ever be tickled again. A week passed, and Lenny Bruce was booked into a theatre on the Lower East Side, and the audience was more than usually anxious: what would he say? How can he say anything at a time like this?

And Lenny Bruce came out and stared at the audience. He unscrewed the mike and walked away from the spotlight. He stared at the audience, paced up and down the stage, and stared at the audience again. And what he said was this:

"Vaughn Meader is screwed."

Which, as it turned out, was true.

Posted at 6:58 AM to Almost Yogurt

My wife often reminds me that the cultural references I make in conversation are sometimes way beyond my audience.

As a result, I hardly ever refer to the "eastern portion of your western sandwich" anymore.

Have a great Christmas!


Posted by: Fritz Schranck at 10:37 AM on 24 December 2003